Making life work well depends hugely on where we place our focus.  Healing and becoming happy also depends hugely on where we place our focus.  A simple idea, focus on what you have the power to control instead of focusing on what you have no power to control.

If you apply that principle to becoming happy after an abusive relationship is over, the following are things that you have no control over and you need to stop focusing on them.

• Trying to understand your abuser
• Thinking why they did what they did to you
• Trying to figure out how long the pain will last
• Thinking and wondering about what your ex is doing
• Trying to figure out why your ex narcissist is doing anything at all with their lives.

What to focus on if you want to be move on, heal and be truly happy

• Think about and take action on good self-care routine to be loving to yourself
• Think about what areas of your life you need to grow so you do not get into an abusive relationship again 
• Think about what brings you joy and do them
• Think about what you need to do so that you can meet your true potential in your life
• Think about the ways that you can learn and practice unconditional self-compassion
• Think about the ways that you can learn and practice unconditional self-acceptance